Random thoughts on our impending doom and everyday life, courtesy of a Romance Writer who occasionally feels the need to talk like a Sailor.

Tuesday, 29 May 2012

The list of things I have vague notions of achieving... or, trying to set goals.

I’ve been asked to concoct a list by my lovely writing mentor, Louise Cusack. A list of what comes next. Now there are many things in life I would like to achieve. I want to learn how to shoot a gun and actually hit the target past the ten metre point. Yes. I’m really that bad at it. And let’s face facts, when the sh*t goes down that is going to be wildly insufficient for fighting off the zombie hordes. My partner will probably ditch me for someone cooler and younger who can actually aim. In his dreams this woman most accurately resembles Emma Stone. Or so he says. To his detriment. But I haven’t been to the pistol range in a year and a half now. I’ve been... busy.

I imagine completing my list would feel something like this. I can fly, you fools!
I want to lose 8kgs and fit into the Levi’s that have been sitting in the back of the closet for about the last two years. Preferably before the Romance Writers Conference in August, pretty please Fairy Godmother. Funnily enough, sitting on your butt all day is not so great for the size of said butt. I am in fact doing something about this one. I’m Hoola Hoopin twice a day and eating these diet bars that most closely resemble compressed bird food with foul fake chocolate poured all over. Mmm. Tasty. But I don’t care. I’m a doing it!

I also want to catch up with my To Be Read pile. I’ve managed to get it down to “Sheltered” by Charlotte Stein, “The Chimera Vector” by Nathan M. Farrugia, “Destiny of the Light” by Louise Cusack (truth, not a product placement), “Guilty as Sin” by Denise Rossetti, and four others that have slid down the back of the bedside table and I can’t be bothered fishing out right now. I’m trying not to buy anymore. Trying. But people keep publishing. What can you do? And Chuck Wendig put out a book not long ago, now that I come to think of it...

There are three ‘I wants’ that come immediately to mind. None of which are likely to be what my mentor is after, however. She might not even be interested in my lack of aptitude with a gun. I’ve mentioned the pantsing versus plotting approach before around these parts. In many ways we could apply this to life. Deep, huh? Do you set goals or do you just fandangle around and deal with whatsoever shall arise? Fact of the matter is without setting goals books don’t get written. Absinthe can’t do everything. 

I spent the weekend plotting out an approx 80,000 word novel. I’ve got a novella and two shorts that need spanking into shape. How are these things magically going to happen? And I should have a website by now, really. And get an Authorial type head shot photo done. Yep. Write a bio. Keep the blog up to date. Continue trying to figure out how twitter works. I’m not even sure what Tumblr is. Do I even need it? And I should have a rich and fulfilling home life wherein my eldest child ceases to liken me to the Evil Queen and my intake of alcohol is greatly reduced.

So yes, goals. Lists. Hmm. Life is a painful explodey beast that easily gets out of hand. The above however is roughly my three month plan. Not letting new, bright and shiny objects lure me off the path is the key to success. I’ve signed up for the 50k in June that Romance Writers Australia is running because prodding from a wide array of sources is always helpful. Are you a member of RWA? If not, become one. Any book with a whiff of romance is how they roll.

P.S. I’ll let you know if I make it to the pistol club so you can put me back on your Z List.


  1. I have a picture of me shooting a tear gas canister. One of my many skills ... Look forward to seeing you in August Kylie.

    1. I look forward to meeting you properly too, Keziah. The conference is going to be great. And you are now the official tear gas girl. Done.